Yolie's World

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Babysitting Notes

Sorry for the delay in blogging recently, I've been pretty busy. CJ is teething, which means he's been very clingy and not really letting me do much other than hold him, rock him, kiss him and give him Tylenol. Poor baby, it must be hard growing teefers. Right now he is rocking in his swing and I'm babysitting Tabby and Nando while Mom goes to a meeting. They are so cute and yet so high maintenance. They need constant reassurance that Mom is coming back and that they will not be left here. Mom told me she left diapers and wipes, but that I probably wouldn't need them while she was gone. Tabby has pooped twice already (you owe me Mom). I really believe that it's because she's stressed out over Mom not being here. Her routine has been messed with today and that is not good. Of course, they know me and know I'll take good care of them, but they do not know that Mom is going to come back for them. They've had so many caregivers in their short lives that being dropped off somewhere with a bag full of diapers, wipes and snacks signals it's time to say goodbye to this mommy. It's so sad when you think about it. Three and four year olds should not have to worry about such things. Now that I'm a mom myself and am watching CJ develop all his trust and attachment skills and it highlights even more how kids who have been in care just don't get it. CJ is only five months old and this morning he started crying when I was out of his sight (I was putting something in the sink). The look of relief that came over him when he saw me again (two seconds later) was so cute. Now, think about all the kids (I was one of them) who get used to nobody caring when they cry about something. While CJ is learning that I will come when he needs me, Nando and Tabby must unlearn that nobody will come. They must learn to expect someone to care for them, rather than expect no one to bother. They must learn that when Mom goes somewhere she will come back. But the process of learning these things is difficult. While it is very hard for them to be left here with me (which has only happened twice), it is also good for them to see Mom go and come back. They have to learn that she will do what she says. She will be back in a little while and they will go home and she will cook beans for tacos tonight, which they will eat before going to bed in their own beds. Simple enough, huh? Tell that to the scared, deer caught in the headlights babies sitting here staring at me while I type.


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